“If you think you’re lonely now…wait until tonight”

Posted by SweetMemento to Adult ADHD Life 9 months ago | 0 Comments | Post a reply

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“I wanna dedicate this song to all the lovers tonight. And I expect that might be the whole world. Because everybody needs something or someone to love”

You may have heard this early 80s soul song before.  Just like addhd dating life at times, the song goes through a maze of indecision, ups and downs, wrongs and rights that ultimately leave one lonely at the end of the night..most nights, every night??

So…it is true we do need something or someone to love…. some of us at least.  Without scrutiny, living with ADHD creates its challenges when it comes to dispersing that love.  Often, times I am handing it out like candy to anyone with enough patience to accept.  At least that was before I realized that something to Love could be my health and that someone could be me…I have to looove that, those, self…help me find appropriate wording here.  I’m that special someone I need to become more acquainted with, ADHD/mania and all.

The best way I can begin loving someone/something else is to start with loving myself!  It takes a special person to dive into enjoying who they are, and an equally special person to join in that commitment.  I’ve heard it all before, “You are crazy…do you ever stop talking…why does it take pulling out your entire closet to go see one movie?!”  The truth is, understanding ADD/ADHD takes commitment from both people involved.

Finding balance can be difficult, but setting out clothes ahead of time and waiting while actively listening in a conversation is possible with practice.  Being organized and keeping a schedule to pay bills on time, writing things down, and using some tlc doesn’t hurt either.

Now if anyone calls you crazy, politely let them talk to the hand, and think about all the unicorns, trains, homework, laundry, Will Smith, chilli, or Sunday night football you want as you walk away…

I came to understand I deserve respect in every relationship, especially the one with self.  Confidence and Happiness didn’t come naturally in the midst of akwardness, but now I know if I find the courage to create friendships or maybe something romantic I respect both of us enough to be honest and open - hopefully they would be too!

Communication, even when I feel withdrawn and confused as well as a need for positvity increases any budding relationship in my opinion. 

Ultimately, I feel that the deepest relationship has to be created with what’s growing on the inside, a smart beautiful love machine will crank that out as much as possible.  Someone who takes comfort and finds gratitude finds love in every relationship already surrounding them… If I continue to know that, and push myself to share it in healthy nurturing ways: I will never be lonely. 

So, thanks for the sweet tunes Mr. Womack.  I may have to put a little extra how to in loving ways with coping/building skills.  However, as long as I understand kindness, patience, loyalty, communication and treated others how I hope to be treated I’m sure I will be just find.  And, who wouldn’t love a creative, energetic, hopeful person with lots and lots and lots lots to talk about. 

You don’t ever have to be alone, love is inside and all around you…tonight, tomorrow, and the next day

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