Couples With One ADHD Partner
ADHD Partner with an ADHD Son
I have been dating my partner for over a year now. Before dating I had no experience with ADHD and it has been quite a learning experience. He has 2 children from his previous marriage, a 16yr old daughter and a 14yr old son. The son is diagnosed ADHD. He doesn’t behave like other 14yr old boys I’ve known. He gets bored easily and will want to go home when we’re out doing activities together, such as a bike ride or a baseball game. He also has a habit of talking a lot, and I mean a lot. He just goes and goes and a lot of times what he’s saying isn’t true or doesn’t make a lot of sense. I’ve had people over for dinner with him and his father present and I’ve been asked by my friends why he acts so oddly.
Now, an important bit of information is that I have made a choice not to have children. I never wanted kids. I like them just fine, but I just never wanted to give up the freedoms I enjoy as an adult without kids.
So that leads me to why I’m here - I feel anxious around his son. We get along fine and we’re good when it’s just the 3 of us at home. But when I want to go do something fun, something I really enjoy, and he wants to bring his son I feel nervous. I worry that the boy will get bored and start complaining and want to leave, or that his father will have to give his son all his attention. It changes the whole experience for me, and it makes me want to avoid doing some things as a threesome.
I’m guessing there are some of you out there with experience around ADHD children - can anyone give me advice or encouraging words about how to handle this situation? I know it’s on me to adjust and to make things work, but I’m just not sure how.
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