Depression or BMD?
I know you all can’t officially give me a diagnosis (that’s what my doctor’s for), but I feel as though all my previous doctors have missed something. During therapy when I was younger, nothing ever came out of it. Therapy recently has done nothing except get my doctor to prescribe me antidepressants (which have not worked). If you have seen my other post you know that I am seeing a new doctor who I actually really like. However, she’s just a psychiatrist and doesn’t really help with the therapy aspect which is fine by me. When I was 12 or so I entered a deep depression that I haven’t been able to fully shake for the past 12 years. I don’t have manic episodes but I do have episodes where I get extremely depressed (almost suicidal but I would never act on it) and then once I shake it I’m back to “normal”. I’m just thinking there has to be more to my depression. I feel crazy most of the time because my depression seems to come out of nowhere for no reason and having ADD I can’t really sort out my thoughts correctly so my thoughts are literally running around in circles inside of my head.
I guess an example would be I’ve done A LOT of crappy things in my life. I feel extremely guilty about all of it, yet sometimes I know there is nothing I can do to change the past so I try to just make my future better. Other times however (when I’m extremely depressed) I wallow in the past, get eaten up by guilt, have no hope for the future, and since there is no light at the end of the tunnel I think I would be better off not being alive (I’ve NEVER acted on my thoughts).
Also is extreme guilt a symptom of ADD, Depression, or BMD?
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