I’m not sure you can. She is just like you.. Too stuburn to change unless something drastic happens. Some of us have to learn the hard way.

When she is ready you can try talking to her but your young there is no rush. If she is as out of wack with hormones than give it time, once post partum depression is over maybe you can talk to her.

while you are taking care of yourself look around and see if you see something in her that you can work with.

I have similar things in my family and sometimes your sanity is more important than being friends with family.

Good luck
http://addsherpa.com

Some people simply cannot comprehend the way that the ADD mind works. Despite experiences with myself and my son, my wife can still barely acknowledge that ADD exists.

The idea that ADD manifests itself in a way of thinking that is totally different from how she sees the world is simply incomprehensible. Therefore, there must be some other reason for the behavior.

So following attribution theory to the letter, not only does she create possibly reasons for the observed behaviors, but she believes them wholeheartedly. You cannot changes the minds of people like this. You might as well stop trying.

a few possibilities here

simple sibling rivalry. being right does not make miight. And the dismissingt is simply keeping you from getting that seat at her table of “acceptance”. This one is kind of distressing because it isn’t eve rejection, it is lower than that. It is lack of acceptance.

Door number 2, she has ADD also and is in denial. My mother and brother both are heavily ADD and they will not admit it. Nowhere to move on this one either, it is like trying to help an alchoholic. They have to admit the drinking prblem or accept it before you can go to the next base.

Door number 3, She could be a black and white thinker and just resent the heck out of your ability to think outside the box and come up with good ideas and solutions, and then do nothing with that talent , or just be resentful in general. Black and White thinkers make up the majority of thinking types in this world. And that you can come up with the hail mary catch/solution usually engenders resentment that they did not come up with that idea, and you, the screw off, did.

If you really want to understand and really know what is going on here, first shake off any guilt or shame, it is disrespectful to our creator.And then if you can find a study buddy and go to this website: http://borntoexplore.org/addtemp.htm

There are very strong commonalities in the thinking and emoting type with ADD. Briggs meyers testing and classification has spanned over decades and many millions are part of it’s database.

ADD/ADHDers usually end up in only 2 groups. And I mean Usually is about 85% - 90+% of the ADD population.

I also think tehere is too much wasted rhetoric on ADD typing. If Another bonus of researching this is that if you refer to you meyers Briiggs Type, you will have known solutions you refer to

And you do not put yourself at risk with someone who is Judgemental and uninformed about ADD and it’s strengths.

If you choose this part of the journey, you might not get the answer you think you want, but you will get understanding, and hopefully peace of mind.

Good Luck in whatever you decide to do, but, DO SOMETHING, don’t just think about doing something,

tjp

Does your dad get it?

Does your sister live with your folks and you? Is she part of your daily life - whether or not you’re in the same household, but you have commitments with her like going grocery shopping together or whatever? If yes, you may need a pretty firm response that is simple, short, straightforward and easy to remember the next time she introduces the topic. If you’re mom’s willing, maybe you two can role-play. This way she’ll also know how you plan to respond in the future. Ideally, she can support you in your efforts and perhaps when the time comes.

Rather than expend emotions, time and energy to get her to see your side of things, (just as it seems she’s trying to get you to see it her way), how about sitting down for a few minutes and making note of what you need to take care of yourself when she’s with you or at the house? Do you really even have time to get into an argument with her? Do you need to get into an argument with her about your ADHD with every time you see her or anytime at all? No, probably not. If you don’t participate in the argument and can redirect the conversation, this may be able to establish a boundary with her, or anyone else on this.
    ‘Sis, we don’t agree on this. And, I feel badly that you believe I’ve lied to you. I’ve been truthful with you about my ADHD. If you ever want to learn about ADHD, I can direct you to some resources on it. When you’re willing to listen and not interrupt, maybe we can sit down and talk about it. Until then, I am not willing to discuss it with you. If you do bring it up, I may ignore your comment and redirect the conversation. If your sister persists and demands that you talk about it with her, you may need to calmly tell her “no.” You may even need to remove yourself from the situation. Or, if its your room, you may need to tell her that you’ll see her later (or not) and firmly invite her to leave.

If you’re late or whatever, you can acknowledge it, apologize and move on. If it’s not your sister, it maybe someone else in your present and future that you can be prepared for.

Now, if I can only recall this for myself when I need to use it.

Good luck and good night!

While both me and my Dad are ADD/ADHD, my mother couldn’t wrap her head around why we could be so forgetful and (in her mind) callous towards others. She’d take things like our inability to notice the basket of laundry, even while we stepped over it, personally since she couldn’t fathom how someone could not notice such a thing.

Then she watched a documentary on PBS called “ADD and Loving It”, and it all snapped into place for her. They do an amazing job of letting a “normal” person venture in to the chaotic mind of someone in the grips of ADHD, but it’s also entertaining and enjoyable to watch.

It actually helped my parents marriage, since it was now clear to my Mom that Dad was not doing any of these things on purpose, it was the way his brain is wired. We’re both high functioning, even without medication (him moreso than me), so it’s easy for someone outside our minds to fall into the trap of “why can’t you just be normal”.

Coming from an outside source, with doctors and scientists backing it up, and amusing (but telling) stories from the hosts, it might help your sister see what your brain is REALLY like, rather than her perception of it.

There may be no way of getting through to your sister yourself, since you’re both emotionally invested in your mind sets right now. Saying something like “Hey sis, you should watch this. Might give you an idea of what my ADD is like.” and leaving it at that could help bridge the gap that has formed between you. Let her come to you at this point, focus on getting yourself better