ADD in Women
Freak among ADDers?
Hey,
I am a 20 year old junior in college, and I was just diagnosed Sept. 2011. I was home-schooled all the way through high school and did enough dual credit to get me a year ahead in college, so I had no idea I had it until after my sophomore year (first full time year) of college.
I have a good doctor and my parents and boyfriend are really supportive, but I am still trying to work through a lot of things with the ADHD. (seeing all the areas of my life I thought I was just dumb but it is the ADHD).
I know a lot of people dealing with this feel like outcasts/oddballs because we work differently than other people, but after reading books and websites and forums and talking to others with ADD/ADHD, I feel like I don’t even fit in among y’all! I feel like an impostor. A lot of my struggles and symptoms manifest very differently. So. I wanted to sort of lay out there what my ADHD experience is, and see if anyone can relate! I would really love to find a woman who has been on this road longer than I have and can help me figure out how to adjust my lifestyle to accommodate all this stuff.
I do have some classic symptoms. Interrupting, distracted while people are talking, jumping from one activity to another, anxiety, depression, etc.
But some of my symptoms are almost opposite what a lot of other people deal with!
I have never struggled with insomnia…I sleep too much. I need 8 hours of sleep minimum, and I have to get 9 hours on a regular basis or I fall apart. Even when I get 9 hours of sleep, I still tend to be drowsy all day.
I am not disorganized…I am freakishly organized. If I am in a messy area trying to concentrate, I can’t do it. I leave schoolwork to go clean and once I start I keep jumping from one thing to the next and get very distracted and wear myself out. I am also practically obsessive about list-making. Instead of taking notes in class, I make lists of all the things I want to get done, organize life goals, or pick out what classes I want to take next semester. I have a constant stream of “i need to do this or that” running through my head that is VERY distracting.
I don’t struggle with making good grades…I have an obsession with school work. I have a very high gpa, but it is so difficult for me to do ANYTHING if there is ANY classwork I could be doing (and there always is). I frequently make the decision to do homework instead of spending time with people and when I am in “school mode” I seem to lose the ability to be relational…I switch from a Melancholy to a Choleric and get very critical and judgmental and can only think about task completion.
I don’t seek stimulation…I run from it. Large groups of people drain my energy so fast. After a day of classes, I am exhausted to the point of tears and have to go hide in my room. I hate loud noises and background noise. If I have too much tactile sensory input, my hands get all prickly and I have to get somewhere quiet and put my hands on a cool smooth surface until I get un-overstimulated. When I get overstimulated I get very sleepy. A deep conversation with a friend will start out well, but I always end up too drowsy to think clearly. I cannot have a job due to this symptom and I am terrified to think about having children!
I end up cutting people out of my life because I get so tired and overwhelmed so easily that I would rather just be alone…but I do get lonely.
Lest anyone think that my symptoms really don’t sound so bad, and I really have it easy, I want to add that I deal with all of these things while I am on two different ADHD meds. Before the meds, I didn’t function at all. I spent the summer in my room, very depressed. and did nothing but watch tv. I have more motivation than a lot of people with ADD/ADHD but I push myself TOO hard and crash hard.
Anyways, I just wanted to know if anyone know where I am coming from?
Top 5 of April
ADDitude's most popular articles last month
1. Five Rules ADDers Should Live By
2. Executive Function Disorder or ADHD?
3. Parenting Your Defiant Child
4.
How Music Therapy Can Build Focus
5. Snappy Comebacks for ADHD Doubters
Important! User-Generated Content
The opinions expressed on ADDConnect are solely those of the user, who may or may not have medical training. These opinions do not represent the opinions of ADDConnect or ADDitude magazine. For more information, see our terms and conditions.
Replies
I would look at talking to your doctor. It is possible you have more that ADHD. You may also have OCD, or ASD. The signs you exhibit point in those directions. (in my humble opinion) Good Luck. And keep us posted.
hiya…im 24 and got diagnosed about 6month ago…i am also the same in some areas…i need a LOT
ov sleep…and never really got any motivation to do anything unless it relates to my sport…the gym etc…im also obsessed with writing lists about everything…but thats just because i would not be able to function without seeing everything wrote down infront of me…i dont no about the sensory stuff tho…
Hi, I’m 52 and had excessive drowsiness and slept all the time when I was younger. But….When Im awake and moving I was hyper. Nicknames…buttinski, butterfly, chatterbox, just to name a few. I was dx with dual inattention and hyper. Still to this day, when I am sitting down doing nothing l can take a nap. But its not as bad as it used to be. I first got the depression under control the worked on the add. I too am organized but in a weird way. I have to have things organized or I can’t think straight. I get anxious. I have limited clothing because I forget to do laundry. The laundry would litterally be stacked up 3 feet before I would do it. I see a lot of similar things in me that you are experiencing. I could go on and on…..
Hi AnnaMarie—I actually do relate to a lot of your symptoms. I have ALWAYS needed a lot of sleep. And I totally relate to the overstimulation of social activities. BTW, I am 50 and was only diagnosed with adult ADD (note, no “H” in that) about 2 years ago, when my inability to focus or find motivation was exacerbated by hormones in early stages of menopause.
Before that I, too, was hyper-organized at times in my life. And I held up a 3.8 GPA in college. But I realize that’s because I love learning. Is that you? Do you enjoy school? Because if so, the ADD hyperfocus could be playing a part there, since it’s something you enjoy.
I also thought at one time that I had Asperger’s syndrome due to tactile irritation with things like clothing tags, etc. I’m not sure how that plays into—or doesn’t—the ADD.
I’m pretty certain now that ADD is what has played into the many disorders I’ve either been diagnosed with or thought I had at some point in my life.
I don’t know if I have any answers for you, but I think I understand your feelings. I would concur that you should talk more with your doctor about all this. By doctor, I’m hoping you mean a pdoc (psychiatrist) who is well versed in women’s ADD. It often does manifest differently for women, and changes through life as our hormones influence our brain function. I was very, very lucky to find a pdoc that is a woman and a D.O. and who specializes in ADD. I still can’t believe my good fortune in that, because at the time I wasn’t looking for someone for the ADD, I just needed to keep up my anti-depressants. But she listened to me in the first session and immediately asked if I had any family members with ADD. I have a niece—who was not only born on my birthday, but also has ADD.
Anyway, I know it can be frustrating. Keep looking around on here. If nothing else, it helps me to feel less abnormal, and also to know others understand what I mean when I say things about how visiting with other people gets me chatty and happy, and then I crash and have to avoid any social interaction for a day or more. Hugs to you!
Thanks, HV66, I will look into that and keep you posted!
Pezza, I agree…I cannot seem to organize my thoughts inside my head, so I have to do it on paper.
janab, thanks for the encouragement and it is nice to know I am not the only one who has to be organized to think.
mulegirlTX I think you are right. I do LOVE my classes, and the ones I didn’t like when I was still doing gen ed stuff I was able to just suck it up and push through (I lost my 4.0 to algebra, and now I have a 3.94). I do have a psychiatrist who specializes in women’s add. He has it too and wasn’t diagnosed till his 50’s! It is SO NICE to know someone else can understand being happy to see people and then needing to just disappear. Hugs to you too!
I was on another ADD forum but all they seemed to do was whine about how awful their lives were…thanks to all of you for being an encouragement!
Reply to this thread
You must be logged in to reply. To log in, click here.
Not a member? Join ADDConnect today. It's free and easy!
What's New on ADDitudeMag.com
More from ADDitude Magazine »