Parents of ADHD Children
I am at my wits end with the homework battles in my home. My 12 year old 6th grader gets A TON of homework. I don’t agree with the amount but it’s the school district we live in. And I NEVER let him know for one minute that I agree I think it’s too much or that would just fuel to his fire.
Anyways, each night it’s like it’s the first time he has ever had homework. Constantly whining and complaining! He requires my constant attention or he will walk away and do something else. I feel like a prisoner in my own home…..actually hate coming home from work some nights. Sad, but true. Breaks my heart to say that ....I love my kids so much, but I just can’t take it.
And now my ADHD husband has become a MAJOR thorn in this mix. All of a sudden it’s like he and my son are “buddies” and I’m the bad guy….keeping after him to study, telling him to plan his week, start on a project instead of waiting until the night before. I cannot continue like this anymore. I need advice…..do I let him fail? He is too smart to be dumb…...he has no inner drive to be ahead of the game. His dad was very much the same way when he was in school however, he somehow managed to get it together in college and become successful. I think that’s why he’s so relaxed with my son…he thinks that he messed up in school and now is just fine. I don’t have that mentality. He needs to become more responsible on his own…I cannot babysit every night.
I told him that if he brings home anything lower than a “C” he will be benched from lacrosse…..his dad did not back me up! I feel like I’m not only battling a 6th grader but his childish dad, too. It has driven a HUGE wedge between our marriage. Who would have guessed after all of these years that ADHD would drive us apart. But, honestly, I really can’t take it anymore. And to have my younger child witness all of this turmoil is just not good for anyone.
So, I guess I’m asking if anyone else has had this problem and what did you do? Do I continue to help him? Or let him fail? Is it fair to let an ADHD kiddo fail when I know he needs the guidance?
Thanks in advance,
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