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Tourette's Syndrome and ADHD

I'm a fraud.


I’m a human resources professional and I am in charge of 400 people. I like my job and I like the people but some days I feel like I’m a fraud. I’m good at what I do and I seem like I’m “normal” at work but I’m a mess when I get home. I don’t do any household work and if my husband didn’t do it I would probobly be living in a dumpster. I have no grasp on money or what things cost. My poor husband takes care of everything and he never complains or gets upset with me. I feel very guilty and I want to change, I try, make a little progress, and then fall back in the same problem. I work very long hours because I don’t want to go home. I think the saddest part is I’m not worried about my relationship or my home life. I’m worried that I’m going to start to fall apart at work. Does anyone have this problem? How do you cope? I do take meds and see a therapist but I’m not sure it’s working.

Replies

Oh, honey, you have brought this up with your therapist,  right? This us a horrible feeling. I’ve felt this for so many years I can’t even remember when I didn’t feel this way. We’re smart, competent,  and accomplished; highly thought of in our work lives, yet we feel it’s all an act. I will say it sounds like you have the one thing going for you that will make all the difference;  your husband. Sounds like he’s supportive or at least not complaining or worse, deliberately making it worse with cruelty and abuse as mine did. If your relationship is what I’m assuming, I think I’d try having a real heart - to - heart talk with him. Tell him how much you appreciate his support, how you know it must be hard on him, and then if he’s one who can be trusted not to take intimate personal shared information and use it as a weapon against you, open up and let him know how how you’re experiencing life. What it’s like to be you. Ask for his understanding and help. This will be ongoing, not a one time conversation,  but if he’s really the kind of guy who believes marriage is a partnership and he truly loves you for who you are, he’ll be relieved to hear that it’s not him or the marriage that’s causing you to be distant. I guarantee he’s wondering if he’s to blame and worried about your well being if he does love you. Take good care, you’re not a fraud, it’s the world that makes us have to pretend because to open ourselves up and be known in this world is scary and dangerous. Please keep us informed and know I’ll be sending positive energy into the universe for you.

Posted by sruasonid on Feb 17, 2014 at 11:53pm

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