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Couples With One ADHD Partner
Intimacy Issues (& Solutions for them)
I was hoping the group could weigh in on any possible solutions you’ve found for fixing (or, if not fixable, coping with) the lack of interest in intimacy that seems to accompany this condition.
My husband has ADD. I do not. He’s always felt uncomfortable talking about sex (went to a religious school, grew up in a conservative family, etc). When we were first dating and married, intimacy would happen a few times a week. Now we’re down to once a month if even that.
I think some of it is that he lost his hyper focus for me. Some of it is the parent-child dynamic that unfortunately developed as he forgot more and more chores or tasks (or remembering to get daycare for our child!). I had to take over because we have a child and he just can’t do his share. He’s a nice man, but he just can’t remember things (even with chalkboard lists on our kitchen walls), he inevitably breaks his promises about what he says he’ll do, etc.
And yet, it’s HIM who is disinterested in sex. Any tips from the group? He and I have talked about this and he goes to a therapist (but only when I beg him to make an appointment). He says he’s just too tired and not that comfortable with sex. I’m turning 40, and fear that I may be in a sexless marriage in my prime. I’d like to help him if I can. I won’t be leaving the marriage regardless, though.
Thank you in advance.