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My son


My son is 10 he is so busy he is like a three year old his behavior is so overwhelming he is constantly jumping off of things he thinks every minute is playtime and he has
horrible melt downs.He is on ritalin and he is in counseling and I have a six year old son , a 15 year old daughter with adhd 7 kids total only three with adhd.What is a good discipline method for my my six and ten year old ?

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I have a son with high functioning autism “with ADHD features.”  He just turned 8, and we have been using the Nurtured Heart Approach for a year and a half.  NHA was created for kids with ADHD.  The book that explains the program is called Transforming the Difficult Child by Glasser.  It has been a life-saver for us, but it is very important to follow each part of the program as it was designed.  (We tried to modify it, only to return to the original design.)  It uses a point system (a token economy), but there is a mindset that is important to adopt, and the positive affirmations that you give your child are critical to its success.  There may also be a counseling practice in your area that offers a class on how to implement NHA, and I HIGHLY recommend taking a class, which is what we did in Friendswood, TX.  The class clarifies and sharpens your implementation and provides support. 

My son had all sorts of behavior problems and was even suspended the first week of first grade.  He ended up in the office nearly every day.  One of his Sunday School teachers had even asked our pastor if it’s ever right to “give up on a child.”  She was asking about my son and he was just six.  I had even begun researching the net for things like “how to tell if your child is a sociopath.”  He was angry, apathetic toward others’ feelings, wanted to die, etc.

He was disliked by teachers and other children and was completely shunned by his peers, even having a child ride by our house and yelling out to my son that “I don’t like you!”  NHA has helped so incredibly well that he has started to change from an angry child who hates himself to saying at church that “everyone here knows me and loves me.”  He is invited to birthday parties and has friends whom he plays with sometimes.  He has a long way to go, but NHA has helped his behavior so that he is more lovable, obedient, and responsible for his own behavior.

Now that I have written this, I hope I don’t have posts like I’ve had in the past who say things like “you don’t need to buy a book” or “you don’t need to pay for a class.”  Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and I respect yours.  I post my opinion because what I write is exactly what I mean to share.  I don’t get paid for someone buying the book or going to a class.  I share from my heart like I wished someone had been able to do with me when I was desperate to help my child.

I was a public school teacher for ten years and tried several other programs, including a hodge podge or diy approach, and none of them worked as well as doing this one by the book, so to speak.  We had tried medications, which only made him sullen and angry, and we tried counseling with someone who specializes in ADHD until she even said she thought we weren’t making progress.

If you’re as desperate as I was, you want to know that something works, and this has worked beautifully.  You can use it with all the kids in your house at the same time and the same way.  There is no physical punishment—tried that and it backfired—and no yelling.  It is positive, firm, consistent, and relentless.  I encourage you to look into it.

Posted by LilOwl on Jan 20, 2014 at 3:46am

Thank you so much for sharing your story. It really helps. All the best to you and you family.

Posted by marbri0520 on Jan 20, 2014 at 3:51am

Yes I will definitely look into that I can’t let my son go anywhere without me he gets into to much Trouble.

Posted by ummhawaa on Jan 20, 2014 at 5:43pm

I would look into the sports somehow it could fit for all of them: swimming is totally ok and would keep your children mind and body working for goog. One student(at college) told my husband that the only thing that worked for him was swimming and playing soccer. He could only concentrate for short time of periods but when he was at sports everything went well…

My daughter is going to try to stik at swimming or water sport for the first time not only for his ADD but mostly for his Depression.

Posted by concernmom on Jan 20, 2014 at 10:17pm

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