New Issue!

Spring 2017 Issue ADDitude magazine Read the 'ADHD Therapies That Work' issue now!

The New ADDitude Forums Are Live!

Reach our full community by posting to ADDitude's discussion forums here


Just Diagnosed With ADHD (Adults)

Not Exactly Recent, However
Keywords:


Hey guys, Melanie here.

I am 21 years old, and was diagnosed at 18. Now I know what you’re thinking, this isn’t recent, wrong place.

However I have only recently found out that the person who diagnosed me didn’t explain the full scope of it, and so I was left with a wrong impression of what was caused by my ADD and left me feeling lower in self esteem.

I was basically stuck with a stereotype as an idea for years, and its only now that I’ve switched doctors that I’m really learning everything I need to. A lot of things I thought were character flaws of mine are actually aspects of my ADD.

Does anyone have any suggestions for me? I feel like I’ve been lied to.

Replies

The good news is that you’re on the right path now. Don’t worry about “the lost years,” but look forward instead.

ADDitudeMag.com has a great First 100 Days resource center that will help you continue moving on the right path: http://www.additudemag.com/resource-center/adhd-100-days.html.

Penny
ADDconnect Moderator, Author on Parenting ADHD, Mom to teen boy with ADHD, LDs, and autism

Posted by adhdmomma on Jul 04, 2016 at 4:07pm

So, I was just recently diagnosed - about a month ago…and I turn 36 in 2 days.

I’m not sure I understand what your previous understanding of ADD was. But I can say that I think that most people, who are diagnosed later in life, particularly women, also feel that emotion that comes with the realization that what we thought where these huge character flaws, were actually manifestations of ADD!
I struggled for years with low self-esteem, shame, and just plain feeling like I wasn’t good at anything.

It’s kind-of a relief for me, as I finally feel validated. But I think it’s normal to feel mixed emotions, when it sort-of like you’re doing a 180, and reflecting on your life, and seeing it through a new lens or perspective.

I think what’s also been helpful for me, was going back and taking a Myers-Briggs personality test again.
It really helped me understand that so many things that I excel in are generally the things that our society doesn’t value, because it isn’t “productive.” I’m talking about traits like empathy, gentleness, warmth, authenticity, etc.
I think that most people would consider those good traits to have, but if you live in the sort-of cut-throat world of competing for jobs, making the most money, keeping up with the Jones’, they are not looked upon highly.
So while I’d probably be terrible at upper level management of a big financial corporation (I’d also hate that sh*t, ha!), I make one hell of a massage therapist. I love my work and I get to do work that I find rewarding.
And if you were to look at my personality type, in the Myers-Briggs model (I’m an INFP) that makes total sense!
(By the way, INFPs, INTPs, INFJs, and ENFPs, are more commonly diagnosed with inattentive ADD, because we value feelings and intuition more when we make decisions. Not logic. We like to operate by our own rules and we are most happy when we can do so.
And I think ESTPs, ENTPs, and ESFPs are more likely to be ADHD.)


So, I rambled and rambled, but go take that test if you haven’t already. I found it helpful, as I navigate this new diagnosis. It’s good to know your strengths and your weaknesses, and how you can work with each. |
This maybe wasn’t what you were looking for, but I hope it helps some!

Here are a couple of links to get you started.:

https://www.16personalities.com/free-personality-test

http://psychologyjunkie.com/2015/09/17/the-childhood-struggles-of-every-myers-briggs-type/

Posted by AerialArtJamiCJ on Aug 06, 2016 at 1:12am

You already have the answer:

You made the “mistake” of putting faith in the first Doc, but then second guessed it.

That’s a good life strategy for you then, don’t fear mistakes, but be sure not to make the same one twice. Sounds obvious enough.

ADD is a wisdom I haven’t yet learned to trust!!! I’m 38.

Posted by fanon on Dec 12, 2016 at 1:30pm

Reply to this thread

You must be logged in to reply. To log in, click here.
Not a member? Join ADDConnect today. It's free and easy!

Not a member yet? Join here »

Search the ADDConnect Group Discussions