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On being lost N alone

Hello - I was told professionally of my ADHD at 48yrs old…now 50. The reading that ive done over the last couple months has educated me on much of my life…...so many answers to the bits and pieces of remember growing up.

Id like to know how many of you others have….at times…..at great feeling of aloneness….emptiness that no one can fill ?......Ive come to learn through reading that maybe this sense of aloneness comes from what ive read as some people ” feeling stuck ” within themselves…..I feeling of being “lost” or “always knowing there was something wrong”. Id like to know how many of you or others you know feel this way and how often? ......This Joani

Replies

Hello, Joani.

Let me start off by saying that you are definitely not alone in your feelings.  I’m a 46 year old male and I’ve just recently discovered that I’ve been suffering with un-diagnosed ADD.  I’ve always grew up with the sense that something was ‘wrong’ with me but never knowing what it was and always, ALWAYS feeling alone and being the outsider of every group.  It was not until I ran across this very site that I realized that I really wasn’t alone.

I hope that this helps you.

Posted by co4mac on Jul 10, 2014 at 1:45am

Ohh Joani,

It was a constant feeling until I got diagnosed at 49, two years ago.

Loneliness. hopelessness, a feeling of treading water (going nowhere) and making no true progress in my life was at the core of my diagnosis.  Also the feeling of nothing being able to fill the void, like a black hole that never got filled no matter what I did. 

I truly believe being chemically imbalanced which is the heart of ADHD just does a number on you on so many levels.

I found relief first with medication and then with Neurofeedback. 

I started a new Facebook page.  You may find it helpful.  I will put the link at the bottom.

I hope you find the answers you are seeking. 

Mitzi
https://www.facebook.com/pages/ADHD-Who-Knew/1467752306802788?ref=tn_tnmn

Posted by Mitzi Maine on Jul 10, 2014 at 1:55am

I’ve had feelings of not living my own life. Sometimes disconnections when in a crowd - talking to someone and forgetting I’m in the conversation, then realizing the person in front of me is moving their mouth, words are coming out, they’re looking at me - oh shoot - I’m in cnoversation - what can I recover - what were we talking about ?  Having this internal conversation while an actual cov=nversation is going on can certainly make one feel set apart.

Posted by Juggler on Jul 10, 2014 at 3:38am

You are definitely not alone! Many ADHD adults experience feelings of lonliness for a couple of reasons:

1) You feel very different from others.
2) ADHD behaviors can make friendships tough and endangered.

Jeff Seigel explains these feelings and his own battle with them: http://www.additudemag.com/adhd/article/10245.html.

There is comfort in numbers. Try attending an adult ADHD support group to feel less alone in your struggles. Here are some other strategies you might find helpful as well: http://www.additudemag.com/slideshow/83/.

Hang in there!
Penny
ADDconnect Moderator, Author & Mom to Tween Boy with ADHD and LDs

Posted by adhdmomma on Jul 10, 2014 at 2:39pm

You’re definitely not alone!  I, too, am struggling with many of these same feelings; growing up I’ve always felt like I was an outsider, and that there was something “wrong” with me.  For years I’ve strongly suspected that I had ADHD, but I haven’t been formally diagnosed yet.  My son has, though, and it’s through dealing with his diagnosis that I became aware of how much my issues are affecting me.  I’m only just now deciding to seek help for myself.

Posted by EverDriftingMind on Jul 11, 2014 at 1:54pm

Nothing more I can describe as @co4mac said same here

Posted by Bobby_pk on Jul 13, 2014 at 6:39pm

I’m 67 single and very alone my relative don’t want me around so holidays are very hard for me. I enjoy people but I’m shy probably because of no friends.

Posted by Linda's RedSoxs on Jul 19, 2014 at 5:46pm

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