Parents of ADHD Children
REPOST: No desire to succeed - need help with reply!
(Sorry for the repost! There seems to be a glitch where people can’t reply to your post if the title starts with a symbol or a number, so I’m trying again.)
Background: My son is 11 and in middle school. This year his grades have dropped, his behaviour worsened and he was very honestly very close to a mental breakdown at Christmas. I managed to get him on medication and things are slowly improving. We are still seeing areas of struggle, so we are pushing for an IEP and accommodations.
His teacher is very good and understands ADHD. She is flexible and supportive. It will be the special ed counsellor that will be writing the IEP however.
I wrote an email to my son’s teacher (after my son got a 58% on his math test) requesting the IEP and also requesting some accommodations, the most crucial being that tests be broken up for him so he doesn’t become overwhelmed. (This latest test was 3 pages long, and he got zero points on the last page, and the most correct on the first.)
So I wanted to paste in a bit of the counsellor’s email and see how you all would respond.
“I can write an IEP for [your son] and will do so after spring break. We are willing to put adaptations in place for [him], but adaptations require [his] participation in what he needs them to be. We can adapt his work but if he is not taking the initiative to express what he needs our adaptations may not be of assistance. He needs to be interested in improving his work for it to be effective. Currently, he does not consistently demonstrate a great deal of desire to be successful at school. Today when given time to study in class for his social studies test he chose to read his book. When offered help from the EA to study for his test, he refused her assistance. I understand we all want our children to be successful in school and achieve good grades but they have to be active participants in their learning for this to be an achievable goal.”
“After I have completed a rough draft of the IEP perhaps we can meet with [your son] and ensure that he feels the adaptations will be of benefit to him or we can add some different ones in for him. We can continue to work with [him] to try to further develop the strategies he has, but he needs to put the strategies into practice and actively particpate in the learning process for him to be successful. He has shown improvements in his participation in his learning, and he will continue to develop as he matures. It is a process and will not change over night, and his improvements demonstrate that he is on the correct path and with further support and encouragement he will continue to grow and learn. We look forward to helping him through this process of self understanding and self advocacy with you and [your son]”
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