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ADHD in Women


We belong to Sam’s club even though we are just two. The saving on gas is worth the membership cost. I am newly medicated Adder and am attempting to reform my excessive grocery shopping.  We have a beautiful cat living with us that has the benefit of 3 litter pans.  I bought 40lbs of an off brand litter to save $1.75 and immediately smelled the mistake!  So the next day I’m back to the store, list in hand.  I buy two 40 lb bags of the good litter and a 20lb bag of baking soda.  Why?? well I still feel like I should use the bad stuff.  So I dump pounds of baking soda in the litters. The smell is gone, but now I have white paw prints all over the house. Okay, there’s that,  but ..also, I had to go back to Sam’s the same day because I forgot the Alka Seltzer and randomly buy 12 hamburger buns, sandals,3 tank tops and a 36 pack of power bars….It’s embarrassing and shameful really.
  I may be more focused with the medication, but is it on my mistakes??  I wonder if this is progress?  It feels crazy to be unable follow a plan. And, it intensifies into an overall feeling of defeat. Can anyone relate?


I *had* a Sam’s card back when I was undiagnosed & unmedicated.  Everything you said is SO true…and explains why I was a bit relieved when my Dad retired and my Business Membership was no more.  Fast forward to now (been on meds 5 years & have had good results) but I don’t feel any more “safe” in an environment like that—Walmart is only slightly better & less time-consuming than before.  Toyed around with the idea of Costco for a while last year only because I have two teenage boys, but eventually decided it was NOT a good idea.  I am firmly convinced that the only time stuff like that actually “works out” is if you have 1) somebody else to shop with & divvy up the “goods” so that nobody is stuck with enough toilet paper to last 6 months, 2) the shopping partner doesn’t have ADHD and will just bring you back your pre-selected “goods” and hand you the bill.

Posted by BC on Jun 30, 2014 at 7:39am

You may be saving money on particular items when purchasing at SAMs, but the impulse buys you make while in the store probably negate that and might even cause you to spend much more than you’re saving. Price tags at Sam’s are big for impulse buying. You may be better off shopping for items you need at a store that only sells those items (groceries from a grocery store, shoes from a shoe store, etc).

This list of 18 strategies to stay within budget when you have ADHD might be helpful: You’ve already accomplished the hard part—knowing you need to change your behavior, and wanting to. wink

ADDconnect Moderator, Author & Mom to Tween Boy with ADHD and LDs

Posted by adhdmomma on Jun 30, 2014 at 7:25pm

Oh my!  I had the same problem when I had a Costco membership.  I allowed it to lapse.

My husband and I are the only two people in our home, alone with two cats and our dog.  If I need to do quantity buying, I go to Wal-Mart.  For everything else the other stores are a better bet. 

We live about ten miles from town, so it is much better for me to use a shopping list and plan my shopping excursions.  We are retired on a fixed income, so overspending is never good.

Cat boxes!  We use white vinegar to clean ours and we use non-clumping litter with crystals that keep the air fresh.  We use the scoop everyday and change the litter every other day.  Odors are usually caused by what the cat eats, so perhaps a change in brands?  We use indoor cat dry food. We use higher priced canned food, too.  Look at the contents and if corn is at the beginning of the list, then you can eliminate much of the odor by changing to something else without corn.

I hope some of that is helpful.  Keep what works and just lose the rest.

Posted by Dianne in the Desert on Jun 30, 2014 at 7:42pm

I too am such an implusive shopper that I can’t even buy from the grocery store I work at! My husband enlisted my son to order them online and has them delivered! I was embarrassed to tell anyone at first. But when I think of the looks I got when I bought 3 and 4 of everything cause they were such a good deal. I wiped out all the clearance of things that we’d never use cause they’d all expired. I’m like a “kid in a candy store” when I shop and have no concept of time or money. I know all the dangers but they go out the window when I’m in a grocery store especially on an empty stomach.. Thrift stores are a problem too, like Savers and Goodwill. I only validate going when I drop stuff off to get more. It’s a good thing I don’t buy jewelery, clothes, shoes and makeup like a lot of women do. I am not an on line shopper either. Seems the impulse is more of a high for me than a predmeditated buy. Christmas is hard too when you want to “jump on the bandwagon” and buy gifts for everyone including the mailman you don’t know. The next thing I know I can’t afford gas in my car. Also I’ll   take stuff back after the guilt kicks in and say I won’t go into that store again for awhile. It’s very random in a way that I “forget” and “remember “. Wish I had an electric buzzer that could jolt my memory when I get in situations that are tempting.

Posted by Maryquitecontrary on Jun 30, 2014 at 10:20pm

Thanks everyone.  I loved maryquitecontrary’s line…It’s very random in a way that ” I forget and remember”.

That is so very true..I’m speechless.  smile

Posted by jetergirl on Jul 01, 2014 at 1:29am

Wow!  I can so relate to all the comments here.  I, too, have problems with impulse buys.  I never go to the big box stores anymore without my husband or else I’ll come home with all sorts of random things I see shopping as a big scavenger hunt for bargains.  I lose track of time and get caught up in studying all the cool things I come across.  I load up the cart and am shocked when I see the total bill.  I, too, return things after I get them home.  My husbands gets so mad at me, but it seems the only way I can control it with 100% certainty is to stay out of the stores. That’s no good.  At the grocery store I stick to the list and avoid buying anything that has to go in the freezer unless we’re going to prepare it in the next seven days.  I only allow two of anything, like canned goods, because I can always go back to the store when I run out. When there are too many items in my pantry, it’s too hard to find what I’m looking for. As for other stores,  I now set alarms on my phone and make myself leave when my time is up.  I put things on hold at dress shops and tell myself I’ll come back at the end of the day or the next day to buy them.  Most of the time, I don’t go back to buy them.  The “high” for me is in the hunt, not dragging the carcass home!. Sales are hard to resist for those of us with ADHD.  It’s been a long hard struggle, but with medication, coaching, and a good therapist, I’ve been able to find strategies to help, and thus avoid the shame and guilt.

Posted by runswscissors on Jul 01, 2014 at 10:44pm

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