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Symptoms of ADD in 18 yr old daughter

I’m wondering if anyone has an older teen or young adult with ADD who can help me. I am trying to find out more about the symptoms of ADD to help me determine if my daughter may have it (she has not been diagnosed) so I can get her some help. Does the below sound like ADD?

My daughter is 18 and away at university her first year. Let me start by saying that we have always had a very good relationship but I realize now that I have let her be pretty dependent on me. I’m thinking that now that she is away on her own, she can’t cope, and it has gotten worse over the last several months. Some of these behaviours she’s always had but not as bad. She has always had a messy room at home but nothing compared to her residence room at school - I was shocked to see it - huge heaps of clothing on the floor because she doesn’t put anything away, garbage on the floor and overflowing garbage bags that she hadn’t taken out. She procrastinates terribly. She dropped a course after failing a midterm because she was unable to “focus” to study. She’s letting herself fail another course because she doesn’t like it (and therefore won’t put in the effort to do well). She’s careless with things - broke her computer, lost her bank card and twice lost her room key. She’s terrible with money - she can’t save. Finally, and the most disturbing for me, she rarely communicates with me. I call or text and she doesn’t answer sometimes for days - and then she says she didn’t answer because I nag her.
Does this sound like ADD?
Thank you for any help!!

Replies

Yes.

Posted by BC on Apr 02, 2014 at 3:25pm

Sadly I agree.  I hope you can persuade her to get diagnosed/treatment. Medication could help with symptoms.  I hope she will be open to it.

Good luck!

Mitzi

Posted by Mitzi Maine on Apr 02, 2014 at 4:28pm

I’m really sorry your daughter is struggling, jh—and you as well. 

What you’re describing could be the manifestations of ADHD, but other things could be coming into play as well.  A good conversation with her doctor and a thorough evaluation may be in order—especially to rule out other things that may be going on. 

Good luck, and make sure you’re taking care of yourself as well!

Lynne Edris, ACG
Life & ADD Coach
http://www.CoachingADDvantages.com

Posted by ADD_Coach_Lynne on Apr 02, 2014 at 5:17pm

Thank you all!

My daughter seems unhappy too - I’m wondering if there may be some depression going on. I understand that there can be a link between ADD/ADHD and depression. I haven’t had a discussion with her about any of this yet but I will do that as soon as school is over in April and she is back home.

Posted by jh2025 on Apr 02, 2014 at 6:43pm

It is almost a guarantee there is some depression as well as anxiety going on for her.  They are often at the root of ADHD, symptoms that the brain is not running properly.

I hope she will be open to seeking treatment.  She definitely needs assistance.

Take Care,

Mitzi

Posted by Mitzi Maine on Apr 02, 2014 at 7:52pm

It would help if she had an ADHD coach very soon. You may google ADHD Coaches Organization.

Posted by John Tucker, PhD, ACG. ADHD Coach on Apr 02, 2014 at 8:45pm

Sometimes ADHD and depression are hand in hand and overlap.

She sounds depressed. If you can go to her, get her evaluated where she is located,  I would make decisions *with her and her doctor* about staying in that school.

Posted by chrisd on Apr 02, 2014 at 11:14pm

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