Parents of ADHD Children
Untreated ADHD teen
Well, I’m pretty much at my wit’s end, so I figured I’d throw this out there to see what comes back.
My son is 16 now; nearly 16 1/2. He’ll be starting his junior year of high school in the Fall. He began manifesting behaviors consistent with ADHD during grade school, but his natural intellect and charm carried him through with only occasional bumps in the road (disciplinary issues, frustrated teachers, etc.). I brought up the possibility of his having ADHD way back when, but the conversation never gained any traction with his mother.
Things started to turn south in middle school, and now, in high school, the wheels have come off.
The problem is that his mother (we’re divorced 12+ years) doesn’t believe that he has ADHD, despite the fact that he was diagnosed with “severe” ADHD by an area pediatrician who is regarded as an authority on the condition.
Because we operate in a shared custody situation, she pretty much has “veto power” over the recommendations that we’ve received from an assortment of pediatricians, therapists, and even someone who billed themselves as an “ADD Coach.” Eventually, they all recommend that we get the kid on appropriate meds…at which point she concludes that they’re incompetent, and insists that we discontinue seeing them.
I don’t know what else to do. My son is starting to manifest many of the behaviors that we all know untreated ADHD kids are prone to. He can’t get it together academically, and, worse yet, he just seems to have lost much of his enthusiasm for life. It frightens me.
Has anyone else been down this road? What options do I have left? Do I need to go to the “nuclear” option and take her to court in an attempt to gain sole decision-making power? Do I just ride out the storm until he’s 18, at which point he can tell US what he wants?
I’m feeling pretty helpless here; any/all suggestions are welcome.
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