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Couples With One ADHD Partner

We are loosing our home due to husband's ADHD.


Financial Stabiity…?  My husband is a FINANCIAL PLANNER… we are bankrupt, and losing our home…no way out…can’t even afford a Divorce! ...not sure where to turn :(


I’m very sorry to hear that.  I can relate to your situation from the side of the husband unfortunately.  I was once a terrible steward of our finances and put my family in some dire situations financially. 

First off, I can say that without knowing your husband or you, I can say from my side I felt awful for how the situation I had caused and was even more frightened that the woman I loved would leave me.

Is there a chance your husband could have bi-polar depressive?  Reason I ask is ADHD and Bi Polar Type 2 go hand in hand and people like that, like me, tend to have serious problems with finances. 

I recommend you both get into counseling, nothing wrong with seeking outside help.  Some churches even offer free marital counseling on a variety of issues. 

I recommend you guys look into this guy Dave Ramsey.  He is not everyones go to guy, but it worked for my marriage and finances.  I know its going to be tough losing your home, but your marriage can rise again from these ashes stronger then before. 

You have to find that original love that you felt for your husband and then use it to understand him.  You have to then be willing to sit down with him and ask him, what can we do to help each other.

You guys are a team and I know that with understanding and a solid plan you both can be better then you once were.

Posted by Born2Discover on Jul 14, 2014 at 2:25pm

Turn to yourself.

Which means you will have to take the financial reigns.  If this makes you uncomfortable or scared then remember you can always learn.

We went through a bankruptcy before we knew my husband had ADHD and since then have been in better shape.  Not perfect but better.  I do all financial stuff in our household even though my husband still thinks he is mature enough to handle making spending decisions… There is nothing to do about that.  He has to be treated like an adult even though he doesn’t always behave like one, just for chronological reasons!  And because we have children who need to see him with respect.

It is tough but financial stuff is always recoverable.  It is probably the most panic inducing of all life’s circumstances but you will come out the other end.  You must learn as much as you can though to take control of your financial life.

And at some point you have to understand that he really did the best he could though the results were dire.  People with ADHD cannot handle finances, period.

Posted by YellaRyan on Jul 23, 2014 at 9:45pm

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