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aggression


Hi, my child is 12.5 years old.  He is continually suspended from school and very abusive towards his family, to the point where he tries to become physical.  We have tried a lot of different things, exercise, charts, positive reinforcement, counselling etc.  He is on rittalin as the long acting ones do not seem to work.  Does anyone have any tips, tichniques which may help??

Replies

You might want to go back to your doctor to try a different type of medicine.  There are several excellent ones as an alternative to Ritalin. Each one can affect a child differently.

Counselling, for both you and your child, is also a great way to go. Get a referral from your doctor.

You may also want to get him re-tested. Perhaps he has an undiagnosed learning disability that makes him hate school.  Perhaps he has ODD in addition to ADHD. 

If you feel your doctor doesn’t understand, I would seek out another one who is familiar with these diagnoses.

Good luck!

Posted by staypositive on Nov 14, 2013 at 12:58pm

I agree with stay positive, keep at it until you get answers and help.  Try website LDonline.org.  They have a lot of links that may lead you in the right direction.

Really stay at it with doctors, counselors, etc.

Hang in there!

Posted by Pdxlaura on Nov 14, 2013 at 4:32pm

Ritalin had no effect on me and Adderall made me irritable but I have to say at least Adderall seems to work much better for children then Ritalin does, I would have his medication changed immediately there are many different types of meds for adhd that work great.  Sometimes it takes many different meds before you find one that will work for you.  Also check to see if he is bi-polar because adhd medication will add to manic out of control bi-polar behavior, adhd meds will make them crazy feeling.

Either way please change his medication and make sure he is eating good foods and no sugar or gluten, most children and adults (including myself) with adhd cant tolerate gluten, sugar or caffeine

Posted by BexIssues on Nov 15, 2013 at 10:29pm

You don’t say under what circumstances he gets violent with your family.  But violent doesn’t come out of no where.  It could be chemical, sure, but it probably is also frustration.  He might be feeling misunderstood, he might be reacting to tension in the household.  And also if you yell at him or have spanked him you have inadvertently given the message that that kind of violence is the way to deal with tension and frustration.

Above all else, you and your family members need to stay as calm as you can and try not to react when he is raging or yelling.  Believe me I know from experience this is hard!  But you have no leg to stand on if you yell at someone to stop yelling, particularly someones with ADD!

And may I suggest you all find a way to have peaceful time in your home?  Like maybe right when he gets home he gets 30 minutes of peace to unwind and do what he wants to do, without hassle from anyone or chores or anything.  Everyone needs that but especially ADD folks. I know my daughter with ADD cannot go right into home routine after school routine because it is pressure to pressure. She operates much better with a lot less backlash and upset if she has some down time.  We set a timer and she knows to get on task when it rings.  And talk to him about it.  He’s old enough to have a conversation about how to behave and why it might be difficult for his ADD brain to comply with what you and he wants it to do.

Posted by YellaRyan on Nov 18, 2013 at 7:24pm

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